The teacher was terrified to hear Little Johnny swear. The first one says, "My daddy is so cool he can eat four burgers at one meal." . I didnt even know your father was a detective.Hes not, says Johnny. You need to hide, grandpa. "That's it! Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. Little Johnny Was Busy Doing His Homework. I plan on posting videos. email addresses were disqulified from the list and couldn't be sent. Take a look at the list of short little Johnny jokes I have found for you. A while later, the teacher asked April, Who is our Lord and Savior?. Johnny said, All dad said was, Make sure you wash my underwear, too.. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?, Johnny said, I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? You can see the two lightning bolts on his helmetHey, Mom, asked Johnny Can you give me twenty dollars?Certainly not.If you do, he went on, Ill tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop.His mothers ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. !A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, Where is Jesus today?Steven raises his hand and says, Hes in Heaven.Mary answers, Hes in my heart.Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, Hes in our bathroom!The surprised teacher asks Little Johnny how he knows this.Well, Little Johnny says, every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells Jesus Christ, are you still in there?! Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". Youve done it only eight times. Johnny: Looks like my counting isnt too good either., 17. Little Johnny: Im not sure. !Johnny says, Because Ive already got a cat!An elementary teacher wanted to introduce physiological notions to her students.She asks her class: Whoever feels stupid at times stand up!After a while, little Johnny stands up, grudgingly.The teacher asks: So Johnny, you feel stupid from time to time?Little Johnny replies: No maam, its just painful to see you standing all alone.An elementary teacher wanted to introduce physiological notions to her students.Little Johnny was sitting in class doing maths problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question.Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun how many would be left?None, replied Johnny, Cause the rest would fly away.Well, the answer is four, said the teacher, But I like the way you are thinking.Little Johnny says, I have a question for you now; If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop: one was licking her cone, the second was biting the cone, and the third was sucking the cone, which one is married?Well, said the teacher nervously, I guess the one sucking the cone?No, said Little Johnny, The one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you are thinking.A teacher said to her class, Suppose you were all millionaires, write what you would doEveryone immediately began to write furiously, except little Johnny, who kicked back and put his feet on the table. Teacher: "Ok that's not correct, let's do this again. And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep. Just go to school." 7. Little Johnny was asked to use the pronoun I in a sentence.Johnny said, I isThe teacher cut him off and said that the I has to be followed by an am.Johnny continued, All right. She grounded him. Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" Love sharing with your friends and family? Well, he should be ashamed of himself. Lets explore the different categories of jokes about little Johnny! But I dont want a child.Oh, dont worry, the boy said reassuringly, Ill use a condom!One, day little Johnny asks his father,Daddy where do I come from?The mother and father, had been preparing for this, for a very long time.Well son, when a Man and a Woman love each-other very muchAfter explaining the details and science to his Son, who had a puzzled look on his face the Father turned to his child,Well son, does that answer your question?Not really Susan from school told me she came from Italy.A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: What do you want to be when yougrow up?Little Johnny says: I wanna start out as a Fighter Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest Prostitute, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while bang her like a loose screen door in a hurricane.The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Johnny, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson. I give you two, Jimmy gives you two more, and then Sally gives you two more.Johnny spends a few minutes thinking it out, and again says, Seven.The teacher says, Lets try it another way. The first grade teacher was starting a new lesson on multi-syllable words, she thought it would be a good idea to ask a few of the children examples of words with more that one syllable. He walked up to a house and said trick or treat.The little old lady just gushed over his costume. After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" No, no. said the teacher terrified. Little Johnny says, Do you know what I think? Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. !Johnny: The dog refused to.Little Johnny asks the teacher, Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I havent done?Mrs Roberts is shocked, Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!Little Johnny is relieved, OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I havent done my homework.Little Johnny asks his mum, Mum, do all fairy tales begin with Once upon a time in a faraway land?No darling, says his mother, somewhat distressed, Sometimes, they can begin with Ive got too much work in the office tonight, Ill come home later.Little Johnny comes home and tells his daddy, Dad, tomorrow theres a special Adults evening at school.Daddy is surprised, Really? Thats it! Can I see her?, Johnny: Nope. Little Johnny Joke - Classic Adult Jokes Little Johnny Joke Back to: Classic Adult Jokes Follow @quickjokes Little Johnny walks into school one day to find a substitute in place of his regular teacher. Hes a burglar.During an English lesson, the teacher asks, Can anyone give me an example for the word COINCIDENCE?Little Johnny volunteers, Sir, my mum and dad were married on the same day.Little Johnny comes proudly to his mom: Mom, Ive got a great idea for an invention!Mom: Cool, tell me.Johnny: Its a computerized hair-cutting machine. Teacher: Wheres the English Channel? Johnny: I dont know. Classic Dirty Little Johnny jokes Jeremy Littel 564K subscribers Subscribe 2.6K 100K views 2 years ago Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. Lets find out the clean little johnny jokes! The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. "No!" Jimmy replied. In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? Me, my mum and my dad, we sleep on the same bed. Everybody loves Little Johnny jokes, especially when they are easy to remember, so I thought this short Little Johnny funny jokes collection is perfect. 7. Get updates on new posts directly to your inbox! Mom to his kid: Johnny, you come dirty from football. Hes a thief.Teacher: How far have you gone with your homework Johnny?Little Johnny: About 8 kilometers miss. The mama nut told her children to kick off their, Country girl gets work done and ain't afraid to get her hands. In a rocking chair Why are geologists good at stand up comedy? Thats a stethoscope hanging around her neck.Third was little Johnny, This is my great grandpa. Knowing Johnny's more mature sense of humor she picks Mike instead. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?, A teacher asks her class, What do you want to be when you grow up?. Little Jonny replies, Last night I was passing my parents room and my daddy said Honey, turn out that light. Legendarily naughty Little Johnny sat in class quietly as the students were composing a poem with their teacher. Laughter is the best medicine in the world. She said no, but he said that hed tell her what their cleaning lady said to his father when she was gone. No, no. said the teacher terrified. 4. Read more: Funny and Dirty Jokes: A Combination of Tickle and Giggle, Mom and dad are having sex when little Johnny walks in. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. Youll never know when youll need it. Little Johnny replied, Thats easy. Why are geologists good at stand up comedy? Dirty little Johnny jokes for all. The Teacher fainted. Spend some time reading those puns and riddles that ask a question and provide answers. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. All of them are dirty.'" If you liked this, please share by using the share button below. Shocked, the teacher, trying to retain her composure says, "Wow, Johnny, four syllables, that certainly is a mouthful"
Eddie Got Funny Jokes 105K subscribers Subscribe 37K views 1 year ago #jokes #trynottolaugh #joke. He said that if he hit the lottery, then he would have a secretary to answer the question. Required fields are marked *. ", Little Johnny is constantly late for school and what's worse is that he always has a big lie explaining why. We have a simple and elegant solution for you! I plan on posting videos of my. 3. There was another pair exactly like this one at home.. He asked his parents where they got him from. Instead of manually entering the email addresses you want to send to each and every time, you can now create your own personalized contact list that will be available for you to use any time you want to share one of our posts with your friends and family. "And you, Susie? " He rushes home as fast as he can.He runs in and shouts Dad, dad, can we play builders?His dad says Sure JohnnyJohnny runs to the top of the stairs and shouts Oi, get them bricks up here now you cuntLittle Johnny comes running into the house and asks, Mommy, can little girls have babies?No, says his mom, of course not.Little Johnny runs back outside yelling to his friends, Its okay, we can play that game again!A teacher asks her class to use the word contagious in a sentence. Ooowww man, you got me right in the eye! he complains to his friend.But the other friend also wants a go and persuades Johnny that he is a much better shot.But bingo, the second shot gets Johnny in the other eye.Johnny gives up: Well Ive had it with this game, Im going home.Mom said I should come back once it gets dark anyway.Little Johnny was late for school. I never want you to use language like that again. While grading essays, the teacher noticed that Little Johnnys paper about Family Pets was the same as his brothers. His mother handed him the money. He says out loud, "One plus six, that son of a bitch is seven. And now tell us all how it is spelled.Johnny: Oh, I just remembered he got reposted to Goa.Mother, English teacher asks class: Which tense is the sentence I AM BEAUTIFUL?Little Johnny replies, Clearly, past tense.Little Johnny goes to the zoo with his mom.Johnny: Mom, look, theres a finger in the shark tank! 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